“The way we regard death is critical to the way we experience life. When your fear of death changes, the way you live your life changes.”

WALKING EACH OTHER HOME

RAM DASS

Close-up of a person's hand holding an older person's hand, both resting on a bed or pillow.

Our Vision

We are a not-for-profit organisation aimed at minimising the distress and suffering surrounding the dying process, both for the person dying and for their loved ones. We offer services for all stages of the dying process:

  • For those living well, who want to get organised

  • For those facing a terminal diagnosis

  • For those in old age to plan while they have cognitive capacity

  • For families whose loved one is near the end and no longer has the cognitive capacity

Two elderly people, one man wearing a green cap and a blue checkered shirt and a woman wearing a yellow t-shirt, walk together on a forest trail, holding hands or assisting each other.

Our Values

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Dignity for the dying

Everyone should have
the opportunity to die with
as much dignity as possible 

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Peaceful dying 

Pain and distress
should be well managed 

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Acceptance of death 

Helping the dying and family to come to terms with death

Leave nothing “unsaid”

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Incorporating a spiritual understanding

As per personal preferences a spiritual element has been shown to ease distress for the person dying and the family

BEFORE DEATH | ANTICIPATING THE LOSS

How can Shifra Centre help?

  • Our team of lawyers can help with preparing your:

    • Will

    • Advanced care directive

    • Enduring power of attorney

    • Enduring guardianship

    • Superannuation

    • Estate planning

    • Organ donation

    • A file with all the relevant information for your spouse/children to be able to manage in the event of your death

For the terminally ill or elderly:

  • Our team of psychologists can help you:

    • Process your emotions around dying 

    • Develop strategies to manage anxiety

    • Work through personal conflicts, regrets, hopes, legacy

    • Create a death plan: E.g. quality over quantity

For the family or support people:

    • Understand how to fulfil your loved one’s wishes

    • How to hold important conversations, resolve conflicts and allow for emotions

    • Understand the general process of dying (common end of life symptoms)

  • Our team can help you:

    • Set up your house/room to support your loved one during this time

    • Find appropriate allied health professionals who understand the end of life process (E.g.physio, nutritionist)

    • Connect you with a “death doula” and palliative care team

    • We will help find you a suitable Rabbi if you don’t already have one

    • We can provide you with alternative spiritual practitioners according to your preferences

Two women sitting at a white table engaged in conversation in a bright office with large windows.
A human hand reaching towards a setting sun at sunset.
A caregiver helping an elderly woman in a wheelchair through a doorway in a home, both smiling.

AFTER DEATH | GRIEVING THE LOSS

How can Shifra Centre help?

  • Our team of lawyers can help with preparing your:

    • Estate administration

    • Dealing with the probate process

    • Intestate succession (for persons who die without a will)

    • Debt settlement

    • Will disputes

    • Tax matters

Psychological Care

  • Our team of psychologists can help you:

    • Processing emotions and moving toward acceptance of the loss

    • Developing coping strategies, finding new purpose and meaning in the face of loss

    • Addressing trauma (for those who experience a sudden or traumatic loss)

    • Age appropriate interventions for children and adolescents

    • For those suffering from prolonged grief, novel treatments will be available

Physical Care

    • Helping with meals for the mourners

    • Funeral or memorial planning / liason with Chevra Kadisha

    • Clearing of personal effects (where possible donate or sell items that hold no sentimental value)

    • Assistance with notifying institutions, like ATO, banks etc

Spiritual Care

The Jewish laws of mourning, known as, Avelut, provide families with a framework to guide us through the grieving process. The Shifra Centre will connect you with a suitable Rabbi to help guide you through the following 4 important milestones:

  • Aninut
    The period between death and burial focuses on the practical arrangements. If there are no family members to assist, the Shifra centre will help with arranging the funeral. 

    Shiva
    The first 7 days after the funeral are marked by intense mourning. Mourners stay home, sit on low chairs, and refrain from regular activities. 

    The Shifra centre can help arrange meals for the mourners and offer support during this week 

    Shloshim
    During the first 30 days, the mourners begin to return to their regular activities, while still observing some restrictions. In the case of children losing a parent, these restrictions last for a year. Your Rabbi will help explain these restrictions. 

    Consecration/Unveiling 
    Often around the time of the deceased’s first yahrzeit (the anniversary of their death), your Rabbi and the Shifra centre can help you with the consecration or unveiling of a tombstone, known as a “habdalah”. This is another significant milestone that honours the deceased and commemorates their life. 

A Personal Story

A young woman and an elderly woman sitting together outdoors on a patio, smiling and hugging, with a clear sky and trees in the background.

When it comes to being with our loved ones during the dying process, we are often completely unprepared. Not only are we struggling to manage our own fears and pain, but most of us don’t know what to say, how to say it, or how to best support our loved ones during their incredibly important and precious final days.

When my mother began to decline, I decided to enrol in an online death doula training course. Having some prior knowledge changed everything for me. I felt so much more able to deal with a number of important aspects of her care, such as how to advocate for her pain medication, and how to make sense of her increased drowsiness and reduced appetite. But mostly - I learned how to be with her. Since I understood that hearing is the last of the five senses to go, I filled her room with her favourite classical and opera pieces. I lit scented candles and lay beside her — bringing comfort through touch, something often overlooked in end-of-life care.

I also understood that the dying often need permission in order to pass. So we gave her that. We reassured her that my father would be cared for, reminded her of the pride she could take in her grandchildren, and in the beautiful life she had built. I would whisper, “Your work here is done. You can take rest now.”

These are just a few examples that helped me witness and attend to her death. In retrospect, I realise that there were other areas I could have benefited from having more support and guidance, … and so the Shifra Centre was born … in loving memory of my precious mother.